So yesterday finally was the day, she came online and got to talk to me. Before this, she contacted me and told me that she got really sick and that went to the doctor and got pronosticated with some foul condition. Some infection with her ovaries that might send her to become steril. This sounds extremely scary. So far I have been thinking a lot on our relationship that I tend to forget that she is not right. She get sick way too much. I think that something is fundamentally wrong with her since she gets a lot of migranes, stomacaches etc.SoÃ‚Â nowÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â willÃ‚Â goÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â doctorÃ‚Â andÃ‚Â startÃ‚Â gettingÃ‚Â someÃ‚Â analisysÃ‚Â going.Ã‚Â AfterÃ‚Â thatÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â willÃ‚Â knowÃ‚Â ifÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â hadÃ‚Â anyÃ‚Â chances.Ã‚Â IÃ‚Â wishÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â couldbeÃ‚Â rightÃ‚Â thereÃ‚Â withÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â atÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â moment. The only thing I could do for her is sending her some money for the gyno and medicines.WeÃ‚Â talkÃ‚Â aboutÃ‚Â everythingÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â haveÃ‚Â beenÃ‚Â feelingÃ‚Â aboutÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â andÃ‚Â howÃ‚Â seriousÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â wasÃ‚Â aboutÃ‚Â ourÃ‚Â relationshipÃ‚Â soÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â higherÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â got,Ã‚Â theÃ‚Â harderÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â fell.OneÃ‚Â ofÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â thingsÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â wantedÃ‚Â wasÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â engageÃ‚Â withÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â asÃ‚Â soonÃ‚Â asÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â wentÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â US,Ã‚Â andÃ‚Â thatÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â almostÃ‚Â toldÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â thatÃ‚Â butÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â toldÃ‚Â meÃ‚Â thatÃ‚Â shewantedÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â beÃ‚Â somethingÃ‚Â moreÃ‚Â thanÃ‚Â anÃ‚Â emailÃ‚Â orÃ‚Â phonecall.Ã‚Â WhichÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â reasonÃ‚Â whyÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â wantedÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â seeÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â whenÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â gotÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â US.HoweverÃ‚Â goingÃ‚Â onÃ‚Â withÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â chatÃ‚Â itÃ‚Â wasÃ‚Â aÃ‚Â bitÃ‚Â shockingÃ‚Â butÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â haveÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â suggestÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â pullÃ‚Â outÃ‚Â beforeÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â tooÃ‚Â late.Ã‚Â IÃ‚Â thinkÃ‚Â thatÃ‚Â whatÃ‚Â Ã‚Â sheÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â doingoutstanding.Ã‚Â ButÃ‚Â sometimesÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â getÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â feelingÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â onÃ‚Â aÃ‚Â suicideÃ‚Â mission.Ã‚Â SheÃ‚Â gotÃ‚Â aÃ‚Â lotÃ‚Â ofÃ‚Â expectationsÃ‚Â onÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â schoolÃ‚Â butÃ‚Â atÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â sametÃ‚Â timeIÃ‚Â justÃ‚Â dontÃ‚Â thinkÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â awareÃ‚Â ofÃ‚Â whatÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â givingÃ‚Â upÃ‚Â inÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â process.Ã‚Â HealthÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â oneÃ‚Â ofÃ‚Â theÃ‚Â thingsÃ‚Â mostÃ‚Â ofÃ‚Â usÃ‚Â takeÃ‚Â forÃ‚Â grantedÃ‚Â howeverÃ‚Â Ã‚Â most people think that health is a matter of a flu when u are sick and then you get well. However there are many damages that are permanent and thats what really gets to me. I dont think the risk she is putting her body into.IÃ‚Â hopeÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â getsÃ‚Â well,Ã‚Â IÃ‚Â reallyÃ‚Â needÃ‚Â herÃ‚Â toÃ‚Â beÃ‚Â well.Ã‚Â IÃ‚Â feelÃ‚Â soÃ‚Â responsibleÃ‚Â forÃ‚Â her,Ã‚Â evenÃ‚Â ifÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â isÃ‚Â notÃ‚Â withÃ‚Â me,Ã‚Â isÃ‚Â becauseÃ‚Â ofÃ‚Â meÃ‚Â andÃ‚Â IÃ‚Â thinkÃ‚Â thatthisÃ‚Â issuesÃ‚Â sholdÃ‚Â haveÃ‚Â beenÃ‚Â dealtÃ‚Â byÃ‚Â meÃ‚Â ifÃ‚Â sheÃ‚Â wasÃ‚Â tillÃ‚Â withÃ‚Â me.Ã‚Â Ã‚Â So far I think I want to talk to her and really have that conversation I have been thinking for the longest time. Then I will try to get to see her, which is only 1 week away and I really don’t think I will but I also think is necessary. I don’t know what will the future depart us. But I really hope things settle in.